Categories
Creativity Failure Spirituality

Holy Failure

As a young woman, I struggled to find myself and my place in the world.  I dropped in and out of college, held more jobs than I can remember, and moved to and from various exotic locals. I tried marriage—and divorce. Mostly, I lived in a whirl of confusion about who I was and how I would make my way—and I worried a lot about ending up a failure.

Nothing I attempted seemed to satisfy me. I watched my friends successfully pursing their ambitions, while I languished in feelings of inadequacy for the better part of a decade. At the time, I could not know that my experience with failure would give me exactly what I needed to eventually succeed. Not only did that protracted period of frustration inspire me to create something entirely new, suffering the pain of repeated failures helped to humanize me, maturing my capacity for compassion.

Categories
Depression Healing and Wellness Spirituality

Understanding Depression: A Woe That Is Wisdom

There is a woe that is wisdom, a woe that is madness—Herman Melville

From the moment I was born, depression began to weave itself into the fabric of my life. Alone and frightened by the responsibilities of a new baby, my emotionally fragile mother sank into a black hole from which she only occasionally emerged. At a very young age, I threw myself into trying to understand the enigmatic forces that had taken my mother from me and that threatened to debilitate me as well.